Monday, January 3, 2011

An Onion

Lately, I have found
that thinking on my sins
is like pealing through
the layers of an onion:
that is, that it stinks,
makes me cry uncontrollably,
and, I've decided, would
not be good in my salad
after all.

Humiliation! Starring Matthew Blackwell and Seabass(?)

Matthew Blackwell was another victim of the Shannon (cf. Shannon Shelton entry). Matthew garnered the approval of Shannon and her minions by doing absurd dances on command (Shannon like Jabba the Hutt-ess, stuffing alien froglike things into her giant mouth, summoning more entertainment with a wave of her creepy puppet arm). Matthew was no buxom slave-girl, however, no Slave Leia (if you haven't seen Return of te Jedi enough to understand my references, then you're just not cool enough to read this blog). He was just a chubby kid who wanted to be liked, and thought that everyone's laughter was somehow with him, as friends, when it was clear that it was at him, as. . . let's say drunken cannibals (as children, in their hearts, often are). In spite of all this inflammatory rhetoric aimed at the Shannon, a confession seems appropriate here, for a hopefully instructive comparison. About 2 years ago when I was working as a substitute teacher, I subbed for an elementary Special Ed. class a few times. I was requested specifically after the first time because the other teachers (Note: Special Ed. classes are team-taught for reaons of manageability) liked me a lot and wanted me back. These ladies had a lot of fun doing their job, which was refreshing in a Special Ed. class. I'd subbed in Special Ed. classes before that had a cloud hanging over them all day, where the teachers seemed to think that kids preferred heavy pity and obsessive coddling to a love that was both tougher and lighter--what most kids need and prefer. There was one kid, Sebastion, who was maybe 8 and had Down's Syndrome. He was affectionally referred to as "Seabass," and generally beloved by all. One of Seabass's favorite things to do, and one of the teachers' favorite things to prompt him to do, was dance to music. Particularly, in a moment of spotlighting him on the floor, we would all clap in rhythm and yell "Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!" and Seabass would do this crazy air-humping thing that cracked us all up, and which he enjoyed thoroughly. What is the difference, I wonder, between our interaction with Seabass and Shannon's with Matthew? I think we all genuinely cared for Seabass and showed him the kind of love kids need. I don't think that Shannon actually cared about Matthew in this same way. But I truly wonder, and to be safe, will ask for forgiveness.